Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
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Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
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Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
NoShamevember. You game?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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