bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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