Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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