i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
