dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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