One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
