I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
