you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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