OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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