nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
