Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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