no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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