My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
