I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize