have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
whose parrot is this?
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