Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Randomize