I bet he comes in French.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
