dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
