I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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