Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
