i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
don't judge my taste in strippers
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
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