Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
4 words: hood of his car
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
