YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
