belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
