Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
that's an acceptable place to lick
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Randomize
