also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
