More tranny stories later!
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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