dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
