I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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