im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
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