break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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