After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
now i know why i became what i already was.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
