im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
