Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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