so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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