I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
