I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
