It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize