what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
