dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
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