Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
