i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.