He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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