take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
