only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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