i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
tell me about the eggs
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
