we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Of course I have a pirate flag
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
