If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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