you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize