Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
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