Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
