either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
