I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize